With hubs at the See Jane Write 5th Anniversary Party

This past fall I started hosting a new event in my town that I call the See Jane Write Wine Down. It’s a gathering at a local wine bar & lounge, a girls’ night out of sorts, but one with a distinct purpose. The See Jane Write Wine Down is meant to give female writers, bloggers, and entrepreneurs an opportunity to meet with other women on a similar journey to share their troubles and to get encouragement and support.

This all came about because of a conversation I had with a fellow female entrepreneur at a networking event. She, like me, is building a business while working a full-time job. She’s also a wife and a mother and her husband is getting restless with the late nights and early mornings she’s spending working on her dream.

She’s not the only woman I know fighting this battle. I attend at least one blogging conference every year and at each conference I meet a woman asking for advice on how to get her spouse or significant other to get on board with her goals. I want to help you with this in case you’re struggling with this, too.

For tips, I turned to my greatest cheerleader, my husband, Edward T. Bowser, who is also a blogger at SoulInStereo.com.

To the spouse who’s not being as supportive as he or she could be, Edward says, “Part of marriage is realizing that your partner’s goals and dreams are also your goals and dreams.”

And when working towards a goal everyone involved must be willing to make sacrifices.

“They can’t succeed unless you give them space to succeed,” Edward says to the partners of big dreamers.

We must do our part, too, however, to make it easier for our partners to support us. One way we can do this, Edward says, is by making them feel included.

Share with your spouse or significant other the boss babe moves you’re planning to make or the creative endeavors you’re hoping to pursue or the personal growth you’re hoping to achieve.

For example, share the goals you’ve set for 2017 and the plans you’ve plotted to make those dreams come true.

“Don’t just tell everybody on Facebook; tell your partner,” Edward says.

My husband’s support for me goes far beyond lip service. He promotes my blog posts on his social media accounts, he’s by my side at every awards ceremony, and he’s at most See Jane Write events that I host helping to set up, clean up, and sometimes even working the registration table.

While it’s easy for my husband to understand my blogging goals because he’s also a blogger, he is not an entrepreneur and has never had aspirations of being one. Yet, my very cautious and extremely frugal husband is even OK with me spending money on my business and taking financial risks.

“You have to believe in your partner’s goal and part of that means letting go of the pocketbook,” he says. “You can’t make money if you don’t spend it.”

When I ask him why he’s so supportive of me despite the fact that my business keeps me from being home some evenings and even sometimes cuts into our quality time on the weekends he simply says, “When you shine, I shine.”

So the takeaway is this: get your partner to be just as invested in your dream as you are by making it a shared goal. And you can do this by including your spouse or significant other in every step of the process of pursuing your dream. And be sure that you’re just as supportive of any dreams he or she has, too.

And on that note, be sure to check out SoulInStereo.com, the best hip-hop and R&B blog you’ll ever read!

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